DONC JE SUIS
Nous sommes, donc je suis – We are, therefore I am.
I derived this ‘Nous sommes, donc je suis’ from the famous quote of Descartes ‘Je pense, donc je suis’, which means: ‘I think, therefore I am’. A very unfortunate quote as I may say. We took it literally and exalted the intellect above everything else. As a result we’re all inside our head instead of our belly, where we can be the creator of our own life. Go to Step 6 for more on that topic. We're also inside our head instead of our heart, where we can manifest an energy and state of being that benefits us. Keep reading for more on this topic 😊.
‘Nous sommes, donc je suis’ means ‘We are, therefore I am’. What I am trying to say with this, is that we are not alone, we are always interconnected and live symbiotic with the world around us.
We are affecting and affected by the world around us. Today we breathe the air that just yesterday gently touched a flower on the other side of the world. Not only are we interconnected with nature, we are interconnected with other people as well. And through supportive and nurturing others we build resilience, and we can thrive. Not just exist, but THRIVE.
This Step 8 is two-folded: There is the focus on our hearts energy that makes us feel the connection we have with the world around us. And there's this interconnectedness that we can utilize to build resilience, to have a feeling of belonging, to find our tribe and thrive.
Interconnectedness even has a neurological basis: mirror neurons. Mirror neurons enable us to imitate actions, intentions and emotions of others. Mirror neurons help us with interpreting facial expressions and hand gestures, and they show us the deeper levels of communication that happen between our brain and the brain of others. Just holding hands makes our brainwaves resonate with each other. In those moments we are on the 'same page' or the 'same level' or the 'same wavelength'.
I know that it doesn’t always feels like you are supported and loved. I too have had moments, and even longer periods of time in my life, when despair was rampant. When you think you've done something wrong you tend to feel ashamed or disappointed in yourself. And you want to isolate yourself and with that you cut yourself off of the support and nourishment of others. If you are in that kind of place at this moment, then I’m here to remind you that you are not alone.
Step 7 gives you important info on how others can manipulate you into thinking you've done something wrong when you actually didn't.
Let me share an exercise to release your attention from your head and strengthen the energy of your heart. I touched this exercise briefly in the 3-minute-meditation of Step 5.
Breathing through your heart.
Sit down in a place where you are not disturbed. Relax.
Focus your attention on your breathing, in and out… Feel your breath. Take a few moments to do so.
Then picture your breath going through your heart when you breathe in, and feel the energy around your heart rising up. Also Picture your breath going through your heart when you breathe out. Take deep breaths in and out, and picture it going through your heart.
You’ll be out of this heart-centered-state from the first moment your attention is drawn to something else. Don't worry, this is normal. Try to get yourself in this state of being as often as possible and as long as possible.
You will feel the energy of your heart swelling and getting bigger. You will notice a peace that comes over you, like now you know what's important and what’s trivial. You will feel a connection with the world around you.
You're no longer in a 'fight or flight' modus (thesis - antithesis). But you're in the synthesis position where you have an overview. A higher state of consciousness, the 'master inside the carriage' we talked about in Step 3.
We are a part of something greater. We cannot exist alone. Humans are naturally a herd, we have a need to connect and to have a feeling of belonging. We need help, support, nurturing, caring and balanced attachment. For more on attachment see Step 4.
We women thrive when we share with those who belong to our 'tribe', with those who make us feel supported and cherished. We have a natural tendency to care for others. It is in our DNA. We share food, friendship, warmth, music, knowledge, etc., with those people close to us and those who resonate with us: ‘We are, therefore I am’.
So, let's build up each other's resilience and thrive. Let’s build a wise women’s network, one by one.
The above-mentioned breathing exercise is a very good starting point. You can do it together with someone and the energy you build up in your hearts will accumulate. Share your story, your knowledge and your hearts energy with others who resonate with you. A one-to-one contact is all it takes.
Activ8 your tribe
We can all participate in an activation. Search for a group of women who come together around a specific theme. A theme that interests you and participate.
Activating on itself is not for all of us. Not everyone feels comfortable standing in the spotlights. But for those with the means and dedication to do so, this can be very rewarding on an emotional and energetic level.
This is the next level of sharing one-to-one, this is sharing in group. When we share in group the energy will activate the participants in their quest into themselves and into wisdom.
Studies show that in the last 50 to 60 years men’s stress levels have increased with 10%. Women’s stress levels have increased with 100%. We women need to handle this stress. When women come together, we create oxytocin, which makes you happy and eliminates stress.
Most of us will participate, but some of us will activate.
An image I like to share:
We have been existing, for thousands of years, in a patriarchal society. From a masculine point of view, power has a vertical structure. You have the boss, then the manager, then the foreman and then the worker. One has power over another, except when you are way down on the bottom of the ladder. You get the picture.
Balanced masculine energy is protective and strong, it is doing and achieving, it is logic and reason, and always respectful and warm.
For some time now, the energy is changing and the feminine is reclaiming substantial presence. This does not mean we are going to a matriarchal society. It means there is a re-evaluation of both masculine and feminine energy. From a feminine point of view power has a horizontal structure. More specific: a circle. In a circle the attention, the affection and the compassionate energy is pointed towards the middle of the circle. In that way everyone participating in the circle can access and benefit from it.
Balanced feminine energy is giving and nurturing, it is creative and receiving, it is intuitive and heart-warming, and of course always respectful and warm.
To get a better understanding about masculine and feminine energy:
Masculine energy needs challenge to grow and is pointed to solving problems. In the bronze age they just took their spere, calculated the force and angle that was needed to throw the spere and catch some dinner.
From a historic point of view men are not great talkers. They are not so much into sharing what’s on their mind. That is because men went hunting, and when you talk, the animal you want to shoot will hear you coming and will escape.
The feminine energy on the other hand needs the senses to grow and expand. We women love taking a bath, put on warm soft clothes, a relaxing smell, some good food, listening to our favorite music, … We want to share a problem as a way of connecting with each other. In the bronze age women lived close together, took care of the children, kept the fire going.
And women are great talkers 😊 Women had to make noise so animals would not attack them. Also, we are great in details and remembering details. Women sought out roots and berries as food. So they needed to know which ones to eat and which ones are poisonous, how to get there, when to get there (the time the berries are ripe), and tell the other women all this specific information.
So as you can see, the nervous systems of men and women are developed differently. The left and the right brain hemisphere of men work separately and those of women are connected and work as one brain. That explains why men and women have different interpretations and come to different meanings.
I have no guidance on how to activate. How you, as an individual woman, activate a group of women, is all in your hands. When you do the previous steps (1 to 7) the ‘how’ will become clear. Every woman will have her own special way and will use her own specific attributes and gifts.
Let’s start a revolution!
You have come to the last of the 8 steps of 'When Wise Women Whisper'. Remeber, that even if you have done all the steps, you will come back to certain steps when the time is right. Life is a spiral!
As a beautiful closure you can end with this ancient Nahuatl blessing